
In my hiatus from my blog, I finally took care of something that's been troubling me for months. A lump in my right breast. It's in the opposite breast of the one I've already had two biopsies on. And yes, you read that correctly. It's been troubling me for months. Many months.
I'm sure you're all thinking the same thing. I thought it too.
How on earth can I be at high risk for breast cancer, watch my mother lose her life to this terrible disease and walk around for months not doing anything about this lump in my breast?
I can't honestly answer that. I don't know why. I thought about it constantly but was paralyzed by it.
When my father was doing better, I made a promise to take better care of myself and managing this lump was priority number one.
I switched doctors and am so grateful I did. My new doctor is at the same facility my Mom and aunts' (two of my Mom's sisters also had breast cancer) oncologists, genetic counselor and others involved in their treatment are at. I found myself with a team of doctors ready to do all they could to help me.
I had several mammograms and an ultrasound like I usually do. I received good news that I appear to be okay. You never know for sure until pathology is complete but it looked encouraging.
We then reviewed my family history, personal risk factors, genetic predisposition and so on. On top of the risk factors I already knew about, there were others I didn't realize I had. My risk was even higher than I thought.
We worked with tools provided by various cancer organizations, reviewed the pathology of my previous two biopsies and discussed at length the difficulties in identifying suspicious lumps due to the density of and fibrocystic changes in my breasts. I would require a host of constant screening including MRIs, mammograms and ultrasounds to truly keep an eye on my breasts.
I was referred to a surgeon who specializes in breast cancer to determine a course of action. In the end, it was decided it was in my best interest to complete a prophylactic double mastectomy.
As odd as this sounds, I couldn't be happier. I am scared but I am certain.
I don't know if everyone realizes this or not, but in doing so, I cut my chances of getting breast cancer down to about 3%. It feels so incredibly good to know that I am doing everything I can to eliminate my chances of this awful disease that so mercilessly took my mother's life.
Looking at it now, I feel like my Mom died so I wouldn't have to. I feel like her death has something to do with me living. It led me down a path that I fully believe is not only life changing, but life saving. My Mom is my hero.
I feel good about this decision and am grateful for the team of people I have now.
My next step is to consider reconstruction. I never really thought about reconstruction but after talking to my sister and a friend who has had a mastectomy with reconstruction, I'm a bit more open to it now. I've had one meeting with a plastic surgeon. If I decide to do this, I think I will go the tissue expander with the use of AlloDerm followed by implants route. I'm still not sure, but I'm leaning towards this.
If by chance anyone has any experience with this, I would really love to hear from you. I have found a couple of blogs but any links to something you think might be helpful would be much appreciated.
Thank you for being my friend and allowing me share this with you.
image source: abcnews.go.com
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
I'll Have A Prophylactic Double Mastectomy With A Side Of Implants Please
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I have been so worried about you. I sent you messages awhile back and was just thinking today that I would try to contact you again. I haven't been reading as many posts lately due to what has been going on in my life. I am so glad to see your post. I am crying though after reading this news. Have you already had the surgery. I do totally understand. I have always thought what I would do if I had breast cancer. I have always thought a lumpectomy would not be a choice and that if they were to remove one breast I would want both taken. You do sound so much better. Now I understand why you sounded so sad before. You had so much on your mind. I feel so bad for what you have gone through in this decision. Not for the surgery part but the emotional part. You are a strong person with a great heart. Now, don't you dare disappear like that again. Prayers and Hugs from your Fairy Blogmother. XO
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts and prayers are with you.
ReplyDeleteI haven't done this, but my mom has had breast cancer 4 times and I have deeply considered it!!! I think it sounds like a great idea!! No point in going through all that cancer stuff if you can prevent it early! I say go for it!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have talked to a lot of people and know what to expect. As someone who has only had a mastectomy on one side and no reconstruction, I am not the best person to give you advice.
ReplyDeleteSome advice if you do have a double mastectomy: Take a button up shirt to wear home. Your arm motion will be very limited! Be sure you have someone to take care of you when you get home from your surgery. You will have drains coming out of your incisions, which will be in place for up to 10 days. That's all I can think of right now!
I gave your blog info to another blogger I know who has had a double mastectomy with reconstruction, so she might have more insight!
Girl...I'm so glad you are back. And I don't know how I missed your post the other day. I sent you an e-mail once just wondering if you were ok, and I too thought the worst. Keep on doing what you are doing to take care of YOU. Us bloggers can wait..but it's good to know you are happier. I wish I could offer advice, but I can't. I know how scary it is to have biopsies and wait and wait and wait. I have had two. So I say keep on doing what you're doing and just...well...if you could just give us a smidgeon of information now and then to let us know you are ok...twould be good.
ReplyDeleteCindy Bee
One of my good friends just had a full hysterectomy last summer and is also going to get a double mastectomy because she tested positive for the BRCA gene, and has had many family members die of cancer. I'm going to send her over to you--I know she will be a huge support to you!!! xoxo
ReplyDeleteJust know I'm praying for you..:)
ReplyDeletei had a prophylactic double mastectomy at 37 in 1995 and haven't looked back~~i didn't have reconstruction~~for several reasons and am so glad i didn't~~~i actually have several pairs in different sizes~ "i can be any size i want to be"
ReplyDeletebe sure you ask the plastic surgeon for before, during and after pictures~~{i'm sure lots have changed in the years since my surgery} but seeing the after photos at the time made me decide not to have reconstruction and i've never regretted it~~
good luck with your surgery
i failed to say that my breast specialist had me tested for the BRAC gene {while it was being pretested}
ReplyDeletei have the gene while my mother{who had breast cancer} doesn't~~i got the gene from my father's mother~~who had double breast cancer in the 1940's~~and had 2 children later and lived for 40 more years!
You are making a very brave decision. I had the bilateral mastectomy - bilateral oopherectomy and free tram reconstruction all at once. I feel "free". It was such a good decision for me and I truly have not regretted that decision for a minute. I had enough tummy tissue to use for my boobies - but I'm thinking you don't have that option and the implants will be best for you. I know two friends that have had them and they are both pleased.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right about your mom giving you life. (again) She would be so proud of you for being proactive (at least that's what I think)
I am so sorry that you have to deal with this beast but being educated and doing whatever possible to survive is courageous and freeing. Good luck to you. Blogging about it could be what saves another persons life.
Thanks for sharing. Email me if you have any questions I may be able to answer.
Diane
I'm a survivor of stage 4 agressive cancer. I had a double masectomy and my lymph nodes taken out on my right side. I was told I wasn't going to make it 2 yrs if I was lucky.... I did 1/2 of my chemo treatments and was so sick I couldn't get out of bed. I was told after chemo I would need radiation as well. Well I started getting really bitter. I wasnt feeling sick until chemo and if I was going to die anyways I wanted to spend my time enjoying my kids and life, not sick and depressed. so i quit the chemo the doctors and focused on my kids.I paid cancer no mind....(as best I could)...well I went back a year later to see about my port being taken out. and by the grace of God my doctors were shocked to find no traces of cancer!!! amazing!!! I have always struggled with my appearance since my surgery. I was afraid of reconstruction and I was gonna die anyways I figured what for right?.. well after the good news I made my appointment with my plastic surgeon and was told since I waited so long my scars were attached to my bone and i would never wear a bathing suit again..it wouldnt be what I hoped for...with that I decided I was used to making my own bras and so I should just be thankful for my life....
ReplyDeleteI have to tell you I wish I would of gotten there sooner...
but I am thankful for my life and happy to be here. I saw your story and I could totally relate.... I just want to say never give up and your mind is a powerful thing along with your will to live... Goods luck and God bless... oh by the way its now been 5 1/2 yrs... IM ALIVE!!!
BEST WISHES,
kIMBERLY